One Of My Resolutions

I have always been a shy person. One of my New Years resolutions is trying to get rid of this shyness. Some people find me anti social, I am not, I am just very shy. Why is it that when people invite me over most of the time  I find an excuse not to go? That is not entirely true, a co-worker has invited me to her place a few time to watch movies and I did go. She’s is the reason that I decided to get rid of my shyness, it is fun to be with friends, especially her, she make me laugh and I like hanging around with her. I am still held back by being shy. I have a problem speaking about anything other than television, movies, music, the weather and computers. It makes me look like I am shallow, but I am not, I do have feelings, I would like to be able to ask the questions to know more about the person I am speaking with.  I don’t know if it is because I am afraid of committing a faux pas or the fear of being rejected for being myself, maybe a combination of both and some other factors, all I know is that I have to do something, I have to expand my comfort zone. I have to be a lot more outgoing. It is going to be hard but I have to be persistent, I will make it happen. That is why I am putting this on the blog because once it is out there in the open I cannot easily deny that I made this resolution.

It is easy to write a blog semi-anonymously than to speak with someone on how you feel. On this blog I’ll write about almost anything but if you were in front of me I probably would not say a word. Being Shy should be considered a disease. The drug companies should create a cure they would make a fortune (well a bigger fortune than they are making now) even though there is a way to fight this condition out there: alcohol! The problem with this self medication are the side effects: seeing double, hard time standing up, making an ass of one self, the slurring of speech, making questionable decisions, feeling like shit when it wears off,… etc.  Like most other drugs the consumption of alcohol can cause drowsiness so do not operate a motor vehicle or heavy machinery.

A major side effect of alcohol as a anti-shyness treatment is a condition known as limp-dick. A lot of men will over self medicate to build up courage to speak to a beautiful woman, and if they do not make an ass of themselves and the woman does invite the man for a nightcap, nightcap stands for roll in the hay in this scenario (for those of you who cannot understand metaphors inviting someone for a nightcap or a  roll in the hay stand for “telling someone you want to fuck them), the man may not preform because the booze has prevented them from pitching a tent, pitching a tent means get an erection in this scenario not actually pitching a tent and for you crude uncouth people out there erection can be replaced by “get a hard on”. Us shy people need a better medication to fight our condition. I implore the drug manufacturers too get working on it now so that there is a cure before I die or too old to actually care if I get an erection or not.

With all of that said, I have proven to you that writing a blog is not the same as speaking with someone face to face. Unless I was shitfaced drunk, I wouldn’t have dreamed of saying this to someone I did not know for at least a year or five but on this blog I write anything that my heart desires, well almost anything my heart desires.

Before I go, I’d like to mention that I am a salesman, oh the irony. Yep, I work all day speaking with people I do not know and try to convince them that this item is made for them and why they should get it from me instead of from some other dickwad elsewhere. I enjoy selling, it gives me a high when I close a sale, be it big or small. I amaze myself when I am done with a customer, that I have actually started a conversation with them and that I have been very charming with them without blushing, well sometimes I do blush. Maybe I should treat everybody I meet like I do my customers, I never thought of that before. I’ll try it out and I’ll hope for the best. Wish me luck.

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