Deep Fried Christmas

Merry Christmas a day late! I was not in town yesterday, I did not have access to the internet. For our Christmas feast I had planned to deep fry a turkey, make some potatoes, brussel sprouts pan fried with bacon, asparagus in a vinaigrette, my mothers stuffing, gravy, home made cranberry jelly, oysters for the appetizer and cream brule for dessert. It was supposed to be the ultimate Christmas meal. I couldn’t wait, I love cooking. you hear that ladies a man that loves cooking and I am still single!

I started making the creme brule in the morning. The turkey was soaked in a brine of salt, brown sugar and water for 16 hours. My mother made her famous stuffing and the cranberry jelly. We prepared the brussel sprouts by taking them apart leaf by leaf, what a tedious job, but it was going to be worth it. It was a very windy day. Not to cold but the windchill factor made it seem very cold. It was so windy that it caused a power shortage. Well the meal would not be spoiled by this unexpected turn of events. Like I said we planned to deep fry the turkey. Worst case scenario we would make the potatoes on the bar-b-que, the brussel sprouts with bacon on the bar-b-que side burner, warm up the stuffing in the bar-b-que, eat the oysters raw and top of the creme brule with sugar and use a propane torch instead of putting them under the broiler. It would still be a great meal.

My brother and I fired up the burner to fry the turkey, placed the pot with the oil, a hell of a lot of oil, on the burner. We opened up each a brewskey and waited for the oil to heat up.We cooked the turkey it took about 15 minutes to heat up the oil and 35 minutes to cook the 15 pound turkey. We had three bears each and a martini. Deep frying a turkey on the patio deck in winds of 60 km/hr is nerve wracking business. After taking the tukey out of the oil we had to wait 30 minutes for it to finish “cooking”, That is when we decided to make french fries with the potatoes. A few were sceptical, my sister in law and my mother, they taught the fries would taste like turkey. We tried one potatoe. It took about five minutes to cook. I wanted one of the women to taste the fries because my brother and I was under the influence and anything would have tasted good at this point. They liked the fries. We fried the potatoes. My brother decide that we would fry the brussel sprouts, why not? We tried a fistful of brussel sprouts. The women did not like them but Alain and I did. We added salt and Lise and Mom gave us the go ahead. We deep fried the brussel sprouts and we threw in the bacon that was cut up to pan fry with the brussel sprouts, it could not make it worse.

I almost forgot to mention that all this was been done in the dark because the sun sets at about 4:30 in this part of the country this time of the year. We had a flashlight to eluminate us. The last time I tried to deep fry a turkey it tasted very good but the turkey was a deep colour of black, this time it looked black to me when we pulled it out of the oil, well everything looked black because of the lack of electricity. The turkey was not black and it tasted great.

All in all we had a very good Christmas meal even though the odds were stacked against us. We all know that fries are good but deep fried brussel sprouts are an acquired taste. We forgot to eat the oysters and the stuffing. We did not make the asparagus in a vinaigrette, the wine was very good. The creme brule was excellent but what I enjoyed the most was being with loved ones. I guess that is what Christmas should be all about. Merry Christmas to everybody.

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